The New Version of Chivalry
I have to share a story to start this blog. I am part of a women's mentoring group for my bank. I was introduced last week to the newest group of women. A male executive at the bank, who will probably be our next CEO, kicked off the meeting by telling the women a story as to why he started this program.
He explained that he graduated from Dartmouth College and started a new job at the same time a woman counterpart started. He shared an office with her. He was very impressed with her, and he quickly realized that she was very smart and excelling at the job. She was doing much better than he was at the job. Fast forward a few years later, and they end up getting married and having kids. Since then, his career has had a sharp upward trajectory, and he has been very successful.
As a couple, they decided that she would stop working and stay home for a few years for the kids, with the intent of her returning to work. He has seen firsthand how difficult that has been for her and the repercussions of that decision. She hasn't been able to have the same opportunities to have the same success in her career as he has had. Entering the workforce again has been very challenging for her. He got visibly choked up and said that it isn't fair that society creates a situation for women where they have to decide between a career or children, and he was very upset that his wife hasn't been able to thrive the way he has, knowing she had all the skills to do so. He has three daughters, and he said wants to be part of the change in society by supporting women in their careers.
Seeing him get so emotional about this impacted every woman in the room, and many had tears in their eyes. I told my friend this story ( Melissa:), and the first words out of her mouth was....."That is so hot"....and I agreed wholeheartedly.
With society evolving, our idea of what chivalry is may be evolving too. Women are more independent now and can adequately take care of themselves. We have all the tools to live a secure and fulfilling life. We don't need the knight in shining armor to rescue or take care of us. There aren't any hidden dangers lurking around the corner and we can open our own car doors:) Kindness and politeness should be a norm in a civilized society, not something extraordinary.
The danger that faces women now is a society that tries to keep us in a box and doesn't let us grow to our full potential. The society that makes us feel like we are less than and/or that our needs or desires should be second to our male partners. The new chivalry is a man that is our biggest cheerleader (as we have been to him) and wants us to grow and be as big as we can in our world. A man that wants to help remove any obstacles to our success and encourages our growth. A man that isn't threatened by that and doesn't think our only aspiration in life is to take care of him and/or the children. We aspire to be in a relationship where we care for each other and cheer each other on to be our best selves and reach our highest potential in life. We BOTH make the necessary sacrifices to support each other as equal partners. We work as a team together~against the world, not competing with each other. Now that is HOT!